Weblog 6

December 26, 2005~ 1:30pm
I've been on the schedule of a newborn for the last 12 hours: sleep 3, up 1, sleep 3, up 2-----lol. I really enjoy doing that when I have a day off and no obligations; when I'm holed up here like there's the snowstorm of the century outside. (There isn't) but in my mind, it feels like it.

As to the assholishness on the board I mentioned earlier, the host was gracious and sloughed it off as something that doesn't matter anyway, and I agree. "He who pays attention to the syntax of things, will never wholly kiss you" says e.e. cummings.

That goes for quotes too.


December 28, 2005~ 8:15pm
This was one blue funk day. Partial blame is put on that old bugaboo, "after christmas mood crash"--and honestly, I don't know why, except--it must have been bigger in my mind than I'd thought it was as it was happening. Somewhere inside, there's that little kid who didn't get the doll....

but now the 'doll' might be anything: more time off from work, less worry about a co-worker's health, more fullness of meaning for the season....who knows? I did start posting on another poetry site that started off like gangbusters, then came to an abrupt halt. So I resurrected my old pattern of deleting...lol.....god....I'm such a baby about that stuff. I take everything way too personally. The group was very kind, however, and now I'm back. Don't know where it'll lead-- but for now, it feels just right.

Two more days of work, then 3 days off. Time to diaper the new year baby, plug his chubby cheeks with a pacifier and hang a mobile over his crib. New Year's Eve itself, sucks though. It's much too nostaligic and sad--can't go forward without missing the ones behind or gone away for good, so join me on the 31st about midnight, and I'll cry in your beer for you; you can cry in my cola. Auld Pang Zyne again: goodnight, dad....goodnight. And all ye angels, hover over me with your wings.

I like the way you smell.


December 31, 2005 ~4:30pm



Off of work for the next two days! How I love when these holidays fall on weekends and weekends are stretched to 3 days. Really a treat at this time of year to have that day after to reacclimate and rest. Unlike with Christmas, I do nothing at all on New Year's Day so it's particularly restful for me. I'll just sleep in till late afternoon (both Sunday AND Monday), and have a lovely chunk of time for myself.

Tonight, I'll be going out to a Chinese restaurant with Wayne and his sisters, niece and nephew and his girlfriend. It's a tradition now, and because the oriental restaurants are open on both Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve, it's always open and convenient to be able to meet there and have a meal when everything else is closed. We'll go back to Garnet's to watch Dick Clark on big screen tv, and watch the ball drop in Times Square at midnight. (Wow...that Dick Clarks is some weird looking plasticene dude any more, isn't he? How OLD is he...about a hundred and ten? Creeps me out, looking at those stretched open eye sockets and unmoving, siliconized cheeks. Listen Dick, you're a grandpa now. Hell- you're a great grandpa. Time to give up the reins and along with it that wailing, wriggling teeniebopper music, I think. Get some dignity man! LOL!)

Of all celebrities, Dick Clark has my vote for opting for cryo-freezing of his corpse. Come to think of it, he may just be electronically animated right now- maybe for the last several years. But that doesn't stop him from standing just offside of the screen and gabbing away while some new black chick group shakes their booties for America and all the seven seas, and with satellite boosters in space, we may very well be sending a very ugly message to our intergalactic neighbors. Something like: If you're rich you can be as grotesque as you like. We party on.

Happy New Year all of your out there. (The little green ones too.) Yes, some of us do indeed tromp on quietly with double chins and bellies, wrinkles crinkling up when we laugh, and age spots... some of us have moving faces...



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