Weblog 249
November 21, 2010~ 12:00 am
I'm in a hollow bell, clapperless frame of mind and can't seem to shrug it off. November is usually a much beloved month for me-- and for the very same reasons it's deafeningly dead for me this year: its very austerity is enough in most years to be a comfort, but this year, inside its silence
I find, not peace, but restlessness. It will pass. Such things always do. One little thing happened that delighted me...(we depressives have to hold on to the small delights.) I came home from visiting the grandkids on Friday night, and was propped in bed and ready to delve into a book, and I reached for my purse. While I was hunting around for my nail clippers in the zippered side compartment, my fingers found a treat-sized Nestle's Crunch... and I smiled the biggest smile!
Earlier that evening, Bill, Kay and I used flashlights to go down into the basement (it's a game they play, making ordinary things seem spooky)- and we were on a mission to grab some Halloween candy out of the big plastic kettle for our dessert. (I always make a fuss about loving Nestle Crunch bars, so I dug around till I found two buried in there.) "Here's ANOTHER ONE, grandma!" Kay told me happily. "No honey. Just these two, but thank you very much. I appreciate it." (The little gal must have slipped that third one in my purse when she asked if she could get a stick of my gum.) What a surprise for me to discover her thoughtfulness later that evening... and I ate it with greater relish than usual.
Small gifts. Small thankfulnesses......all piling one on top of the other, leading up to the BIG ONE this coming Thursday, so
to everyone out there! Good food... family getting together.... friends visiting friends. (I'm certainly thankful my daughter will again be hosting us at her table. It'll be a smaller group this year- Matt and company are halfway across the country in Kansas) so it's the first year in the last four we won't be seeing everyone, but they'll be here in our thoughts, if not in flesh.
Grocery shopping on Saturday evening, I thought about how those first pilgrims had to scrounge around to fill their tables......how harsh life was then, how hard they had to work to get anything like a feast together. (I don't know if the first settlers and the native Americans actually sat down together at a harvested celebratory meal, but I'd like to think it happened.)
That thought cheers me. How wonderful it would have been if we could have gone on co-existing and cooperating without stealing land or killing one another, but at least the beginnings may have been friendly.
And Saturday evening, Wayne and I watched my second film from Netflix this month.....
starring Michael Douglas, in an eerily apropos role of a man fleeing his own demise by acting out in self-destructive ways. (I know Michael Douglas is now happily married- but for years, and despite good roles, a solid career -he indulged in sexual escapades that were somewhat legendary. LOL!) I've always enjoyed his films. ("The Ghost And The Darkness" is one of my all time favorite movies.) Then there's 'Wonder Boys'......marvelous. On and on.... so many remarkable performances and each one utterly convincing. He's an actor who never seems to be 'acting', but rather enters into the character completely.
In 'Solitary Man' he plays an absolute scoundrel and a liar- a manipulator -yet conversely he's the freshest breath of honesty imaginable, and it's that tension created by contradiction that's so fascinating to watch....he simply doesn't have the same 'censors' most of us do in our dealings with others.
He plays a man running from what he fears will be a dire diagnosis and turns his character's life into a hungry pursuit of women young enough to be his daughters, but he's so charming, it's impossible to dislike him. He's gleeful most of the time... eating baby aspirin and grinning. LOL!!
Thinking of the very real illness in Michael's life right now, it made me so sad.
"I mean, what're the things your apt to hear?" he says, in character. 'It's a good cancer'.... 'we're lucky we caught it early'..." he says to Susan Sarandon who plays his ex-wife, still obviously in love with him, though seeing him clearly. I hope Michael Douglas beats all odds because he's one of the good guys.... hope he beats the odds hands down.
November 22, 2010~ 6:00 pm
You know where I'd like to be right now? (Ah, the Internet, with its close-up views of places I'll never get to.......lol) Right here... in the English lake country. Standing right on Santon Bridge.
Not only is it beautiful, it's also home to THE WORLD'S BIGGEST LIAR- a contest held every November here at
Could anything be as quaint or as charming? I think not! Here's the story: (Santon is home to)
I love offbeat traditions and weird contests....(after all, the British have given us the gurning competition- whereby folks stick their heads through a leather horse collar and MUG IT UP as outrageously as possible in order to grab that title. LOL!!!) So why not a LIAR'S contest?? (And if the countryside is that damn gorgeous, why the heck not!) Maybe if I start rowing now, I might reach them before next November, eh? I am flight-phobic, and will not step on an airplane, so that leaves the sea. "Ahoy there, liars! HERE I COME!"
(Just to whet your appetite for this green rolling lake country a bit more, here's that 'tiniest church'-- Church Of St. Olaf At Wasdale Head- GORGEOUS!) While you're at it, click on ALL the links for more breathtaking lake country photos. Gees!!!!! I wanna GO.
***
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I'm in a hollow bell, clapperless frame of mind and can't seem to shrug it off. November is usually a much beloved month for me-- and for the very same reasons it's deafeningly dead for me this year: its very austerity is enough in most years to be a comfort, but this year, inside its silence
I find, not peace, but restlessness. It will pass. Such things always do. One little thing happened that delighted me...(we depressives have to hold on to the small delights.) I came home from visiting the grandkids on Friday night, and was propped in bed and ready to delve into a book, and I reached for my purse. While I was hunting around for my nail clippers in the zippered side compartment, my fingers found a treat-sized Nestle's Crunch... and I smiled the biggest smile!
Earlier that evening, Bill, Kay and I used flashlights to go down into the basement (it's a game they play, making ordinary things seem spooky)- and we were on a mission to grab some Halloween candy out of the big plastic kettle for our dessert. (I always make a fuss about loving Nestle Crunch bars, so I dug around till I found two buried in there.) "Here's ANOTHER ONE, grandma!" Kay told me happily. "No honey. Just these two, but thank you very much. I appreciate it." (The little gal must have slipped that third one in my purse when she asked if she could get a stick of my gum.) What a surprise for me to discover her thoughtfulness later that evening... and I ate it with greater relish than usual.
Small gifts. Small thankfulnesses......all piling one on top of the other, leading up to the BIG ONE this coming Thursday, so
to everyone out there! Good food... family getting together.... friends visiting friends. (I'm certainly thankful my daughter will again be hosting us at her table. It'll be a smaller group this year- Matt and company are halfway across the country in Kansas) so it's the first year in the last four we won't be seeing everyone, but they'll be here in our thoughts, if not in flesh.
Grocery shopping on Saturday evening, I thought about how those first pilgrims had to scrounge around to fill their tables......how harsh life was then, how hard they had to work to get anything like a feast together. (I don't know if the first settlers and the native Americans actually sat down together at a harvested celebratory meal, but I'd like to think it happened.)
That thought cheers me. How wonderful it would have been if we could have gone on co-existing and cooperating without stealing land or killing one another, but at least the beginnings may have been friendly.
And Saturday evening, Wayne and I watched my second film from Netflix this month.....
starring Michael Douglas, in an eerily apropos role of a man fleeing his own demise by acting out in self-destructive ways. (I know Michael Douglas is now happily married- but for years, and despite good roles, a solid career -he indulged in sexual escapades that were somewhat legendary. LOL!) I've always enjoyed his films. ("The Ghost And The Darkness" is one of my all time favorite movies.) Then there's 'Wonder Boys'......marvelous. On and on.... so many remarkable performances and each one utterly convincing. He's an actor who never seems to be 'acting', but rather enters into the character completely.
In 'Solitary Man' he plays an absolute scoundrel and a liar- a manipulator -yet conversely he's the freshest breath of honesty imaginable, and it's that tension created by contradiction that's so fascinating to watch....he simply doesn't have the same 'censors' most of us do in our dealings with others.
He plays a man running from what he fears will be a dire diagnosis and turns his character's life into a hungry pursuit of women young enough to be his daughters, but he's so charming, it's impossible to dislike him. He's gleeful most of the time... eating baby aspirin and grinning. LOL!!
Thinking of the very real illness in Michael's life right now, it made me so sad.
"I mean, what're the things your apt to hear?" he says, in character. 'It's a good cancer'.... 'we're lucky we caught it early'..." he says to Susan Sarandon who plays his ex-wife, still obviously in love with him, though seeing him clearly. I hope Michael Douglas beats all odds because he's one of the good guys.... hope he beats the odds hands down.
November 22, 2010~ 6:00 pm
You know where I'd like to be right now? (Ah, the Internet, with its close-up views of places I'll never get to.......lol) Right here... in the English lake country. Standing right on Santon Bridge.
Not only is it beautiful, it's also home to THE WORLD'S BIGGEST LIAR- a contest held every November here at
Could anything be as quaint or as charming? I think not! Here's the story: (Santon is home to)
England's deepest lake (Wastwater), the highest mountain (Scafell Pike), the smallest Church (Wasdale Head Church) and Will Ritson achieved its fourth superlative when he became -'THE WORLD'S BIGGEST LIAR'
I love offbeat traditions and weird contests....(after all, the British have given us the gurning competition- whereby folks stick their heads through a leather horse collar and MUG IT UP as outrageously as possible in order to grab that title. LOL!!!) So why not a LIAR'S contest?? (And if the countryside is that damn gorgeous, why the heck not!) Maybe if I start rowing now, I might reach them before next November, eh? I am flight-phobic, and will not step on an airplane, so that leaves the sea. "Ahoy there, liars! HERE I COME!"
(Just to whet your appetite for this green rolling lake country a bit more, here's that 'tiniest church'-- Church Of St. Olaf At Wasdale Head- GORGEOUS!) While you're at it, click on ALL the links for more breathtaking lake country photos. Gees!!!!! I wanna GO.
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